This story originally appeared in the Philippine Daily Inquirer on April 13, 1999.
I have always known Mr. Marcolm as the richest man in our dusty section of Pampanga. He is a naturalized Filipino whose genetic ancestry can be traced to certain dalliances on the Mayflower. He is a wise and gentle man who takes pleasure in critical discourse.
I remember in particular engaging him in conversation on the subject of the death penalty when it was the hottest topic of debates. He started by saying that death is the proper punishment for criminals who commit heinous crimes because their acts are inhuman.
”But, sir,” I protested, ”if we were concerned about meting out condign punishment, wouldn’t it be better if we, say, whacked their asses 100 times 12 times a year for the rest of their lives?”
”My child, that is a most cruel and unusual punishment, which is proscribed by the Constitution. I would think that no sane and compassionate man would ever think of doing that to another person, even if that person were a criminal.”
”And killing them is a better alternative?”
”Of course! Don’t ever think that we are being cruel if we did so. We have the highest regard for their comfort and their feelings. That is why the government uses methods which inflict the least pain in butchering the rascals.”
To convince me some more about the morality of executing convicts, Mr. Malcolm added, ”The Bible itself decrees that death is the penalty for him who kills another.”
”But Jesus also asked that the one who has not sinned should cast the first stone,” I pointed out.
Mr. Malcolm nodded so vigorously that his hairpiece slipped over his brow. ”Indeed, the government agrees that he who cannot claim holiness should not cast a stone against another,” he said. ”That is why we’re using poison now. Anyway, death by stoning is pass,.”
”I think I’d rather see them rot in jail, sir.”
”But that would be terribly inefficient. Do you realize just how much of the taxpayers’ money is spent for the upkeep of these prisoners? We have to spend for jails, food, etc. and these bums do nothing every day except walk around their cells, eat and sleep.”
”If that is the problem, sir, why not make them work for their upkeep?” I inquired.
He smiled at me in a way which conveyed his great patience and said, ”That my young friend would be tantamount to involuntary servitude, which is also prohibited by our Constitution. It would be an unconscionable act of barbarism if we forced these poor fellows to work against their will. Aside from that, supervising the criminals at work would be a nightmare. Can you imagine the number of jail guards we need to employ to make sure that these people do not escape? Why, we’d have to use policemen for this job, and if we did that, nobody would be directing traffic or catching other criminals. No, no. Putting these criminals in a useful endeavor is not an option.”
As always in situations like this, I felt humbled by Mr. Malcolm’s arguments.
Before our talk, I was vigorously opposed to the death penalty. But Mr. Malcolm’s inexorable logic was like a beacon guiding me from the misty darkness of confusion into the light of full understanding. Still, I had to try one more time. ”Sir, what if we mistakenly kill an innocent person?” I asked.
He said lightly, ”That would be high unlikely. Our policemen are very reliable and assiduous in performing their jobs. In any case, killing the criminals would solve some other problems for us. For instance, there was this man who was sentenced to life imprisonment. After 20 years, it was found out that he was actually innocent. So when he was released, he kept pestering the government for financial compensation. Now, if they had killed that bugger, he wouldn’t have been able to complain, would he?”
He said that with a triumphant nod that dislodged his hairpiece from his head. It fell into his cup of cappuccino. He picked the hairpiece up and licked it dry before putting it on again. Then he continued, ”Can you just imagine the nerve of that person trying to collect from the government? Why, just yesterday, the papers reported that the President has resorted to borrowing jeeps for his official use because the government has no money to buy a new car for him. You can just imagine the indignity of having the President ride in a jeep. And an old model yet.”
I could see his eyes getting misty at the thought of the inconveniences being suffered by the President since he is a great fan of the President. Then he looked straight at me and spoke again with a lot of emotion, ”You see, it’s really part of human nature to commit mistakes. If we kill an innocent person now and then, we can simply chalk it up to experience. What I know is that the death penalty is the most fantastic tool of the modern penal system. Of that I am absolutely sure.”
Again, his conviction impressed me. But then he said something which troubled me: ”The real reason we have to penalize criminals with death is that they are a threat to society. In fact, they have injured society. We have to totally eliminate all the menace in order for us to be safe!”
I became agitated at that and asked him, ”But, sir, if we killed them all, who will run the government?”
He replied with a sly wink at me, ”My dear boy, engaging in politics is not a heinous crime!”
Only then did I see the light. We have to kill criminals because they are inhuman. More than that they contribute to the government’s widening budget deficit. It matters not that we may have to sacrifice a few innocent lives now and then. After all, we are only human.
Mr. Malcolm’s infallible wisdom convinced me that he was correct. I went to work in Manila after that. I was given the same job that I had in the province where I worked as a butcher. Strangely, I became more comfortable with my job after my conversation with Mr. Malcolm. Whenever I feel sorry for the pigs I slaughter, I simply reason that they committed the heinous crime of being pigs. That is enough to make me feel better.
But then Mr. Malcolm got himself into some trouble. When I came home form Balic-Balic last week, I learned that he had been sentenced to death for marital rape. His wife accused him of forcing himself upon her when she was four months pregnant with their first child. Under the new anti-rape law, a husband who rapes his wife, knowing that she’s pregnant, must be penalized with death. I hope that he is really guilty. It would be a terribly bad show if it turns out that he is innocent. I wonder who gets to keep all his money. I suppose his wife will get it all. I always liked his wife.
